I’m most thankful for my cook, says Anu Singh Choudhary
Anu Singh Choudhary talks about the one person she’s most thankful for, her cook! Maybe those of us who are fortunate enough to have someone take over our kitchens should be just as appreciative if not more.
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I hate cooking, understanding it pretty well that this is not only a strong statement to make but could also be a valid reason for my own children to make an excuse for not eating well. It is not like I have never cooked, or I don't know the basics or I am incompetent in the kitchen. I just feel tired by the overwhelming thought of making a decent meal day after day, thrice a day, after managing work, twins and the rather unpredictable influx of guests my household is used to welcoming. I feel terrible about feeling terrible day after day if anything goes wrong with the meal planning. The nights could be ruined over the dal which didn't go well with the green sabzi. The weekend would completely go out of the window just because one would end up spending the whole mid morning thinking about the chicken preparation that would go down the throats of adults as well as children.
Everyday cooking feels mundane to me. And as we all know, if you lose interest in the work undertaken, the results can be very disastrous. And no Sire, and Mademoiselle, I don't want my family to go through any such disaster.
I wanted liberation. I wanted complete freedom from this martyrdom of spending hours in the kitchen just because one had to prove oneself as a mother who cared for the health of her family. Judge me if you please, but I still think cooking is one of the most unproductive things that I do in a day. I admire women who have the patience to stand in the kitchen several times a day just to suit the palate of every single individual in the family. Since my mother is one such woman who chose her sufferings in the kitchen quite knowingly, I decided to rebel against it very early in my life.
But one still needs to have meals on the table, right? Healthy, nutritious, fresh meals. Meals which will have a fair balance of all sensations sweet, sour and spicy. A normal middle class family is considered happy and healthy only when the family doesn't repeat a curry from one mealtime to the other.
To maintain such high standards of eating, and cooking therefore, I had to look for someone who would not only understand the pressure of a normal middle class North Indian kitchen, but would happily surrender herself to it. And Shefali turned out to be one such person.
Kehne ko toh, Shefali is our cook who comes twice a day to feed us normal, healthy, nutritious food. But she is much more than a cook to us. She is my only friend in need who remains undeterred by the number of people she has to cook for (which is as unpredictable as it can get). She is the only help that I have who is actually delighted when I have friends and relatives coming and staying over. In our six-year long relationship, we haven't had a single fight (which we couldn't immediately resolve). Because she is here for me to cook for all of us, I have had the luxury of working long hours (or travelling) without worrying about the basic needs. She is my kadak adrak ki chai when my acute sinusitis holds me literally by my throat. She has been the raw papaya juice for us when we had dengue attacking our family. With her home remedies, Shefali is always ready to pull me out of my illness, or despair, or PMS.
While there are one thousand things that I am extremely grateful for, Shefali is the one who tops the list with her selfless care and affection. She is the one reason why I have been rescued from all the never ending maid woe conversations in the neighbourhood park. I will always be immensely grateful to her for keeping us all well-fed and healthy. More than that, I will always be grateful to her for keeping my passion for not cooking alive!
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