Robert Greene in his book “The 48 laws of power” says - to learn and master the social game of power, it is important to develop the ability to study and understand people. You have to be a master psychologist to be a master team player!
Whether one practices this ability for power or for personal development, good interpersonal skills go a long way in empowering your social persona that is very crucial for a successful career path!
An effective communication with clarity is foremost for interaction, as most problems crop up because of a failed communication, assumptions or untold expectations.
“If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough” said Albert Einstein.
Mahalingam, my ex HR VP often shared that while it is important to renew and reinforce healthy interactions to churn out a better you, professionally and personally, an effective and clear communication coupled with a complementing body language is the foremost key to success. He shared how he worked hard to overcome his heavy regional accent that often embarrassed him across large tables with multinational clients. He would practice his presentations before a mirror, he rehearsed his sentences and streamlined his gestures, Googled the pronunciations and recapped the agenda and actions in his mind. He was a very senior man who strived for perfection and never hesitated to embrace change if it were to enhance his skills.
But an interaction is not only about communicating clearly enough but also about effectively connecting with people around you!
It may be hard to reach out to strangers at the workplace as the mind is tampered with fear and prejudices unless we are sales people, but interacting with coworkers is vital as these everyday interactions enable learning constantly.
People who engage in friendly conversations with their peers are seen as more approachable and dependable, people tend to easily agree with them and connect with them better.
Geetha and Sneha are two recruiters in an IT firm, both are freshers, but Geetha is shy, reserved, confined to her desk, hesitant to question and smiles or greets only in an exchange and mostly sticks to her linguistic group but Sneha is warm, greets everyone by name even if there was no reciprocation, barges straight into the manager’s cabin asking for more clarity on work, is crisp and clear in her communications, documents all of her work and never hesitates to bring back two cups of tea whenever she goes to the vending machine after she notices that her colleagues did not break for lunch!
Most clients seek to work with Sneha as they feel more comfortable with her positive approach. Also Sneha is able to get help or delegate work easily because of her warmth, confidence, inclusivity and social aura while Geetha is seen with doubt as an opportunist who will connect only when she needs help, who may or may not return that favour she took.
It is true that not everyone is an extrovert who will make themselves comfortable with strangers in a jiffy, that too if it is a large organization where we work with people of various characteristics coming from varied backgrounds, cultures and beliefs but however diverse our viewpoints and approaches may be, we need to realize the fact that we are here to evolve as a team striving towards a common preset cause and that you can succeed only when you take people along. So it is important to set your prejudices aside and be a team player who connects well with people.
Interpersonal skills are not wearable accessories that you don while on stage and wash off like thin make up when not in the limelight! It is an everyday practice that you inculcate into your lives. It is that little effort to listen intently and empathize with the other opinion as well! It is about seeking clarity in your thoughts that actually translate into your words and actions in your social regimen. It is about nurturing respect and a well-meaning connection with family or fellow workers so as to enable you to put across your ideas with assertive ease and confidence yet in a modest way that would unfurl the canvas for a win-win situation!
By Mayura Rao